CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS - PART 3
Bloopers as seen in actual church bulletins

• Next Friday we will be serving hot gods for lunch.
• If you would like to make a donation, fill out a form, enclose a check and drip in the collection basket.
• Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church.  So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
• Women's Luncheon:  Each member bring a sandwich.  Polly Phillips will give the medication.
• Karen's beautiful solo:  "It is Well With My Solo."
• Congratulations to Tim and Ronda on the birth of their daughter October 12 thru 17.
• If you choose to heave during the postlude, please do so quietly.
• We are grateful for the help of those who cleaned up the grounds around the church building and the rector.
• Hymn of the day:  "I Love Thee My Ford."
• Sign-up sheet for anyone wishing to be water baptized on the table in the foyer.
• Newsletters are not being sent to absentees because of their weight.
• Helpers are needed!  Please sign up on the information sheep.
• The District Superintendent will be meeting with the church bored.
• As soon as the weather clears up, the men will have a goof outing.
• This is the Fifth Sinday in Lent.
• Thank you, dead friends, for your kindness in our time of need.
• Diana and Don request your presents at their wedding.
• Lent is a period for preparing for Holy Weed and Easter.
• Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget all His benefits.
• For the word of God is quick and powerful, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soup and spirit.
• Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peach to men.
• The lovers in the exhaust fan are not working.
• Volunteers are needed to spit up food.
• Needed:  Head Deacon and Dead Deaconess.
• We pray that our people will jumble themselves.
• Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person(s) you want remembered.
• Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.
• The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.
• Today's sermon:  HOW MUCH CAN A MAN DRINK? with hymns from a full choir.
• The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
• Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan in preparing for the girth of their first child.
• The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Green, who has Mrs. Green with him.  After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.